UK forces accused of badger panic

Locals in Basra, Iraq are blaming the British armed forces for an outbreak of what they're calling "strange man-eating, bear-like beasts". One housewife described the terrorizing animal as "swift as a deer... It is the size of a dog but his head is like a monkey".

In fact, the creatures are apparently an indigenous species of honey badger, which a local vet insists that the animals have been living in the area since 1986.

The best quote of the piece goes to UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer:

"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area."

Although, the Iraqi man who claims to have seen a badger eating one of his cows is pretty damn close.